Christocentric

This was quietly reported as I haven’t seen it posted too many places. But just further proof that Obama is in full support of gay rights. Michelle Obama was the keynote speaker at the Democratic Party’s Gay and Lesbian leadership Council – from OneNewsNow.com:

An ABC News report on the event says Mrs. Obama stated that “Barack believes that we must fight for a world as it should be.” She said that world would be a place where, what she called, ” discriminatory laws” like the Defense of Marriage Act (DOMA) will be repealed. DOMA gives states the right to reject homosexual “marriages,” even when such unions are performed in states like Massachusetts and California where they have been legalized.

The Defense of Marriage Act is considered discriminatory by the Obamas. So no doubt here, any and every effort made in defending the act of marriage with one man and one woman will be shot down if Obama becomes president.

and she continues saying . . .

“the federal government should not stand in the way of states that want to decide for themselves how best to pursue equality for gay and lesbian couples, whether that means a domestic partnershp, a civil union, or a civil marriage.”

Michelle Obama went as far as to even equate gay rights with civil rights when the following was said on the Village Voice site:

She mentioned that June 26 was the fifth anniversary of Lawrence v. Texas, the landmark Supreme Court decision that struck down the state’s anti-sodomy law, and she used the phrase, “from Selma to Stonewall,” to connect the gay and civil rights movements.

It’s very disturbing to hear of this type of support for the gay community, but this is something that Obama has been giving us hints throughout! But to equate civil rights with gay rights shows again, that this couple has been completely brainwashed by Rev. Wright’s church, as this was a teaching that the church supports.

Well, there we have it! No doubt at all that this presidential candidate will attempt to put down every act that’s out there in defense of marriage.

More on this later!

Get ready for some fireworks from Dr. Dobson of Focus on the Family! The Drudge Report already has their Monday evening heading shown as:

The Associated Press received an advance copy of Tuesday’s (June 24th) Focus on the Family show. On this program, Dr. Dobson highlights parts of Obama’s past speeches, and the comments he makes just makes me wanna SHOUT!

Dr. Dobson addresses concerns that many of us have about Obama. His apparent lack of belief in the inerrency of God’s word, his lack of understanding of simple biblical passages, and his overall ignorance of the Christian faith and Constitution of the United States.

Here are a few excerpts from that program:

Dobson took aim at examples Obama cited in asking which Biblical passages should guide public policy — chapters like Leviticus, which Obama said suggests slavery is OK and eating shellfish is an abomination, or Jesus’ Sermon on the Mount, “a passage that is so radical that it’s doubtful that our own Defense Department would survive its application.”

“Folks haven’t been reading their Bibles,” Obama said.

Dobson and Minnery accused Obama of wrongly equating Old Testament texts and dietary codes that no longer apply to Jesus’ teachings in the New Testament.

“I think he’s deliberately distorting the traditional understanding of the Bible to fit his own worldview, his own confused theology,” Dobson said.

“… He is dragging biblical understanding through the gutter.”

More tomorrow after the show comes out. Be sure you all catch the program on Focus on the Family, or go on their website (see my list of family resources).

Update after listening to the show (Links: Dr. Dobson’s audio program here):

Dr. Dobson was just getting wind of a speech Obama gave to the Call to Renewal’s Building a Covenant for a New America conference on June, 2006. Dobson was taking great offense to the statement Obama made:

And even if we did have only Christians in our midst, if we expelled every non-Christian from the United States of America, whose Christianity would we teach in the schools? Would we go with James Dobson’s, or Al Sharpton’s?

Dr. Dobson felt he was being equated with Al Sharpton. Maybe I misunderstood him at this point but I felt Obama was merely asking which type of “Christianity” would one choose, the conservative or liberal Christianity. I thought that was a pretty good question to pose though…hmm. But it was that statement that brought Dr. Dobson’s attention to this entire message.

Dr. Dobson continues with Obama’s statement breaking down the percentages of religious participation in our country.

And if we’re going to do that then we first need to understand that Americans are a religious people. 90 percent of us believe in God, 70 percent affiliate themselves with an organized religion, 38 percent call themselves committed Christians, and substantially more people in America believe in angels than they do in evolution.

Dr. Dobson’s Vice President of Focus on the Family’s Government and Public Policy, Tom Minnery was in the studio commenting also and noticed that Obama didn’t acknowledge the fact that of the 70 percent who affiliated with organized religion, they were of the Judeo-Christian belief.

I agree with Mr. Minnery at this point because what Obama was doing, was minimizing the Judeo-Christian tradition of our nation. This was made evident when Obama later points out in his speech the following:

Moreover, given the increasing diversity of America’s population, the dangers of sectarianism have never been greater. Whatever we once were, we are no longer just a Christian nation; we are also a Jewish nation, a Muslim nation, a Buddhist nation, a Hindu nation, and a nation of nonbelievers.

Now if these statistics prove true, then how on earth can Obama claim that we are no longer a “Christian” nation? Are we to abandon are Judeo-Christian principles because of other beliefs that are in the minority? Obama thinks so. He goes on to say,

This brings me to my second point. Democracy demands that the religiously motivated translate their concerns into universal, rather than religion-specific, values. It requires that their proposals be subject to argument, and amenable to reason. I may be opposed to abortion for religious reasons, but if I seek to pass a law banning the practice, I cannot simply point to the teachings of my church or evoke God’s will. I have to explain why abortion violates some principle that is accessible to people of all faiths, including those with no faith at all.

Democracy demands that we translate our concerns into universal values rather than “religion specific” values? Obama clearly does not understand values especially when values contradict one another. This is a clear example of what happens to “Christians” when they begin to cease pleasing God, then go after pleasing men. What a ball of confusion!!!

But the ultimate hypocrisy was pointed out by Dr. Dobson and Mr. Minnery when Obama says in his 2006 speech of the millions of Americans:

They don’t want faith used to belittle or to divide. They’re tired of hearing folks deliver more screed than sermon. Because in the end, that’s not how they think about faith in their own lives.

Enough said. All we have to do is remember the Rev. Wright fiasco.

Is McCain any better than Obama? According to this broadcast, Dr. Dobson and Mr. Minnery both noticed that Arizona is trying to get a marriage amendment placed on ballot. But the Republican party appears to be cowering over the issue and the people are wanting their hometown senator, McCain, to put in a word of support for what would be the third state to place this amendment on ballot.

But not one word from McCain as of this writing. More Republican cowardice? No wonder so many conservatives are ready to bolt the Republican party!

I find myself back to square one on this whole issue. Like Dr. Dobson, I may find myself voting for NO president come November.

See also La Shawn Barber’s excellent breakdown of today’s program:
Barack Obama Enrolls in John Kerry School of Biblical Intrepretation

Parental Detoxification: A period of life experience that acts as a treatment to the physical and psychological dependence on parents. (Webster’s definition modified by me.)

I left for college with a girl I called my best friend. We went to high school together, and then moved across the country together to attend a black college. She and I still go to the same small school , but it has been two years since we’ve spoken face to face. She made it clear that we could no longer be friends. Being around me, she confessed, made her feel too bad. We used to be so much alike; we had so much in common. But today, she and I live in totally different worlds. I believe we detoxed differently.

This woman, and others, I once called friends seethe with anger and bitterness at the mention of my name. After careful analysis, prayer, and hate letters that made it hard for me to misunderstand, the reasons for this disdain is clear: I escaped. I escaped a life prescribed for me by my culture. I ditched the standard of behavior for young women seeking attention from men. I avoided the sacrifices many girls my age make and opted instead for…Jesus.

I’ll tell this story and then I’ll end this blog. I feel it sums up the relationship I formed with Jesus, and the way He has used my Mother in my life.

After an emotionally supercharged freshman year, I returned to San Diego already tired of the men at my school. I could think of no one but my high school sweetheart, who never officially became my boyfriend, but was always there for me. He was a bad boy…and I loved it. If my Mom only knew the half of what I knew about him, surely she would have heavily sedated me and shipped me to boarding school in Alaska. Of this, I am sure.

Well, I remember one night that summer, we were at his house alone. We were making out. And, to spare you the uncomfortable details, if there was ever a night I was going to lose my virginity, this would have been the night. I had a decision to make, and I didn’t have a lot of time to make it. He and I were both so emotionally invested in one another – so much attraction. A lot of trust. But there was someone I trusted more and I didn’t even realize it until that moment. Utterly desperate for a way of escape, I silently prayed “Lord, help me! I don’t know what to d-” That’s as far as I got with that prayer. At that very moment, something happened that halted the mood instantaneously. My phone rang. And who could be calling me at such a late hour?

“Deary? Deary?” The familiar voice said. “Are you ok? Something told me to call you!”

“I’m on my way home, Mommy.” I nearly shouted.

I grabbed my belongings, and sprinted to my car. Fairly flustered but purity in tact, that night I was very much aware that Jesus had in fact heard me…

That was four years ago. Two years ago, after more detoxification and drama, I gave my life entirely to Christ. What set me apart from so many lost young adults? Looking back, after my Parental Detoxification, there was something that was left refined: the knowledge that Christ was real and He wanted a relationship with me. Somewhere buried deep inside me was sold on the fact that He was Lord and could be counted on to rescue me. At a moment where most girls my age sacrifice themselves in a vain attempt to feel loved, there was an internal force, although not fully cultivated, that was nonetheless persuaded that I was already loved.

So…this is where I am today! Still a virgin, totally persuaded that Jesus is Lord, and utterly addicted to His Word (The Bible). I don’t mind putting my business out there, because I want the testimony shared. It does not make me feel good to know that I am despised because of my salvation; I passionately desire for my “friends” to come into the knowledge of the truth and to be saved! But what I stumbled upon that day was no accident. It was placed there. It was sown.

I imagine my mother out in a garden, not having much of a green thumb, holding five seeds in her hand carefully. She loves her seeds so much, and even in her youth, she is determined to find a way to sow them. She knows the only way to see them successfully born is to plant them. So she searches for the most special soil she can find. Finally finding a field promising eternal life, I see my mom kneel and plant the seeds, one by one. She plants the first one…she’s nervous, hoping she did it right. She plants the second one, not sure if she gave it too much water. The third one, she’s got the hang of it. The third and fourth are planted a little more quickly. I see my mom stand back and admire her work, knowing she invested all of herself just to make sure her seeds were settled. She pulls up a chair…and for thirty years she watches these seeds without budging…

Well, Mom, your seeds blossomed! No, the road was not easy. The storms, floods, and droughts along the way threatened to ruin your garden on so many occasions. But you did a fantastic job and the soil of Jesus Christ was enough to give us life, in abundance. I thank you for that, I am eternally grateful to you for that. All five of us are (well, ok. Give the baby a chance, he’s just started detoxing!) So as we blog together, as I say, let’s put our business out there! It will help so many understand the family and what Christ has in store for us. What to do, what not to do. But most of all that by dedicating your life to Christ, there is a protective covering that can not be defeated.

“Trust in the Lord with all your heart
And lean not on your own understanding
In all your ways acknowledge him
And He shall direct your paths”
Proverbs 3:5-6 (NKJV)

Leave questions in the comments for more discussion. But most of all, let’s be ready with open hearts to receive, analyze, and improve this wonderful relationship between parents and their children that God has created for us to enjoy. I can honestly say…my Mom is one of my very best friends. It just took a lot of Parental Detoxification in order for me to be able fly out the nest and worship Christ on my own.

Much love,

Anitra

Who’s Minding the Home?

Probably one of the most controversial issues in raising the children is whether or not to be a stay-at-home mom or career mother. Whether or not a couple can juggle their careers so that one is home with the children or whether one should hire a nanny.

After all the bible studying, character checking, training and disciplining, what happens to the children if we’re not even home? How do we know how to discipline them if we’re not there to witness their actions? How does that all important bonding occur if we’re keeping them 12 hours a day at day care centers or hiring other people to come to our homes and care for them?

These questions are very important when one is considering their role as wife and mother. Even single women should be asking these questions because there are a wave of single women nearing the end of their child-bearing years that is considering children out of wedlock just so that they can experience motherhood. Of course my easy answer to that one is DON’T even consider bringing a child into this world voluntarily without the aid of a full-time father! To me that is simply selfish and inconsiderate of a woman to do. Children need both role models in the home. (Single-parenting I’ll touch on later.)

Women, Be Busy at Home – First, let’s see what the scriptures say about children and the home:

“Likewise, teach the older women to be reverent in the way they live, not to be slanderers or addicted to much wine, but to teach what is good. Then they can train the younger women to love their husbands and children, to be self-controlled and pure, to be busy at home, to be kind, and to be subject to their husbands, so that no one will malign the word of God.” Titus 2:3-5

Oh my goodness. I don’t know about you all, but when I was first married (no Christian pre-marital counseling at all), I did so with the expectation that I would be a career woman, and then don’t “NOBODY tell me I had to obey my husband!” I asked the pastor who married us to leave that word out in our simple generic marriage vows. He honored that request. (Can’t imagine Pastor Miles doing such a thing!) And anyone who knew me wondered why the turbulence throughout my marriage?

The verses in Titus were immediately wrong in my eyes. I did all kinds of studies to prove it incorrect. But in doing so, then NONE of the bible would have been very admirable to me at that point. Later as the word of God convicted me and the Holy Spirit illuminated my understanding, it all began to make sense to me. I actually tried letting my husband have the final words as difficult as that was, but to be busy at home? After my first child called our babysitter “mama” I quickly latched on to that verse to KEEP me home! I didn’t go through the pains of natural childbirth just to have my child call someone else mama! So, stay-at-home I became.

Back to the scriptures. Titus says for the wives to be self-controlled, pure and busy at home. We know that must not mean ALWAYS because the model of a productive woman as the one in Proverbs 31 shows that she is minding her businesses. Here’s the whole section in Proverbs:

God’s Virtuous Woman (Proverbs 31:10-31)

10 A wife of noble character who can find?
She is worth far more than rubies.11 Her husband has full confidence in her
and lacks nothing of value.

12 She brings him good, not harm,
all the days of her life.

13 She selects wool and flax
and works with eager hands.

14 She is like the merchant ships,
bringing her food from afar.

15 She gets up while it is still dark;
she provides food for her family
and portions for her servant girls.

16 She considers a field and buys it;
out of her earnings she plants a vineyard.

17 She sets about her work vigorously;
her arms are strong for her tasks.

18 She sees that her trading is profitable,
and her lamp does not go out at night.

19 In her hand she holds the distaff
and grasps the spindle with her fingers.

20 She opens her arms to the poor
and extends her hands to the needy.

21 When it snows, she has no fear for her household;
for all of them are clothed in scarlet.

22 She makes coverings for her bed;
she is clothed in fine linen and purple.

23 Her husband is respected at the city gate,
where he takes his seat among the elders of the land.

24 She makes linen garments and sells them,
and supplies the merchants with sashes.

25 She is clothed with strength and dignity;
she can laugh at the days to come.

26 She speaks with wisdom,
and faithful instruction is on her tongue.

27 She watches over the affairs of her household
and does not eat the bread of idleness.

28 Her children arise and call her blessed;
her husband also, and he praises her:

29 “Many women do noble things,
but you surpass them all.”

30 Charm is deceptive, and beauty is fleeting;
but a woman who fears the LORD is to be praised.

31 Give her the reward she has earned,
and let her works bring her praise at the city gate.

Now even as busy as this woman was, please note in verse 27,

“She watches over the affairs of her household
and does not eat the bread of idleness.”

This woman is still in charge of her household. Not her husband but her! The men are the primary providers of the family while the woman’s primary job is the household! Again, our priorities must be centered upon God’s expectations of us for our families.

Now do I believe that it’s possible for women with young children to be that busy as the woman in Proverbs 31? Oh no, not hardly! Verse 28 in this chapter gives me a clue to how old her children are. What newborns can say their moms are “blessed?” They are too busy saying “feed me! change me! burp me! cuddle me!” to say anything else. What about the toddlers? They are too busy saying “Mine Mine Mine” to recognize their mother’s worth. And the teens? If they don’t tell us “I hate you” at some time in their teen years then we must be doing something wrong.

I have four adult children in their twenty’s. And it wasn’t until they grew older until that they could begin to say very, very kind things of me. Some of you are more fortunate and the kids do heap praise upon you before they leave home. It helps to have a husband there showing a great example and praising you. It may take the kids from single-parent homes a little longer because they have to hear negative things from the other parent, sometimes confusing them on what is good or bad. But when they become adults and leave home, then they get a chance to see things for themselves and give praise to whomever deserves it. That’s why I’m convinced this woman in Proverbs 31 is a much older woman. Little children just don’t rise up and proudly call their mommies “blessed.” So Dads, please don’t expect your wife to be running multiple businesses while nursing little ones and changing their many diapers! Women with babies and small toddlers have nothing else time wise but to tend to their needs! And she’s lucky if she gets any “mommy time!”

God’s curse on husbands and wives – Remember the ‘curse’ put upon us in Genesis? Where the men have to work all the days of their lives and we women have pain in childbirth?

16 To the woman He said:
“I will greatly multiply your sorrow and your conception;
In pain you shall bring forth children;
Your desire shall be for your husband,
And he shall rule over you.”
17 Then to Adam He said, “Because you have heeded the voice of your wife, and have eaten from the tree of which I commanded you, saying, ‘You shall not eat of it’:
“ Cursed is the ground for your sake;
In toil you shall eat of it
All the days of your life.

18 Both thorns and thistles it shall bring forth for you,
And you shall eat the herb of the field.

19 In the sweat of your face you shall eat bread
Till you return to the ground,
For out of it you were taken;
For dust you are,
And to dust you shall return.” Genesis 3:16-19

Work is the “men’s curse” and not ours. Why are there so many of us trying to participate in both curses? Having children AND working all the days of our lives while having to be under a man’s rule? Now mind you, the children are the blessing part – its the pain in HAVING them that’s the curse! I’ve cursed my husband during each pregnancy, but as soon as the baby came out I wanted another one! I loved the little babies! Early childhood was such joy to me, the happiest time in my life! But I hated being pregnant and the actual childbirth! That’s why there can’t be two mommies or two daddies as a family model because God has specific curses and blessings for each one!

So here it is, biblical examples of the models God wants us to have in our homes. The husband as the head and ruler of his family (godly ruler) and the wife as the primary caretaker of her home. For the family to be well balanced, we must recognize our roles. Does it mean we never hold jobs outside our homes? Of course not. As long as the jobs don’t interfere with our primary responsibility in minding the house. Does it mean the fellas never help with housework? Doesn’t mean that either. If a man is loving his wife as Christ loves the church, then he will be sensitive and compassionate to her needs, as she with his.

Now back to the future. Here we are in the new Millennium with the high cost of housing (if you live in Southern California), gas, food is spiraling out of control and it is just plain ridiculous to make it on one paycheck. Isn’t it foolish to have the wife stay at home when she’s needed to work?

That is the question most asked of us today. Let’s consider the cost of a comfortable lifestyle to the cost of children getting out of control.

When I first became a single parent, I went to the meetings that the police departments would hold here in South East San Diego, (almost the equivalent to South Central Los Angeles in terms of dangerous areas to live), and one of the statistics that stuck out the most to me was the time that most juvenile crime occurred: between the hours of 3pm – 6pm. The hours right after school, and right before parents usually came home from work. These stats were years ago, and looking at those stats today, they are now saying between 2pm and 6pm here. From this same website, it even reports that over one million teens are left unsupervised after school, blaming it on the lack of after school programs. Moms and dads, are we to leave that responsibility to the government sponsored or private schools?

I consider myself a witness that those stats were true. Because in the neighborhood I lived, I can remember the number of times I called police because of fights that were forming at the bus stops after school, and the number of times I met my children at school to walk them home and seeing the gangs gathering. I even ran in the middle of a “bloods” initiating ritual while they were beating someone up after picking up my child from school (six police cars were quickly behind us)! I remember taking home not only my child, but his friends who parents were working and not able to pick them up on such short notice.

I remember my neighbor’s daughter having her boyfriend come over while her parents were away at work. You can imagine my guilt when the daughter came up pregnant later and I could have told them what I was witnessing. I didn’t want to be known as the “nosy neighbor’ back then and kept my mouth shut.

This was all happening while the parents were away. I lived with my parents in a very nice middle-class neighborhood. The gang members being arrested were not only from poor families, but families who had working moms and sometimes dads too! They just weren’t home after school was out.

If we must have more than one parent working, we just have to remember that one minds the house while the other minds the work. It can be done. As a single-parent, I’m expected to work and not depend upon the government. Strangely, the same folks who say that of the single parent also say that it takes two incomes to make it. If the single-parent can make it, why not a husband and wife with one staying at home?

It can be done. Too many single-parents working and making it are a testimony to the possibility to living off of one income – for the sake of the children and minding the home! If single-parents are expected to work, then what kind of help do they have in minding their children? Is the answer by having the children in school eight hours of day then an additional three hours of after school programs? The children aren’t learning their godly mother’s values, but the public schools values. These same schools that are equipping them with same-sex education, contraceptives, and even abortions. That’s who we are giving are children over to without help. In order to make it, single-parents need much support and help to watch their children while they work and make a living.

All the biblical teachings we can give our children and all the admonitions about no condoms, no pills, no sex, no drugs, no porn and the like are meaningless if we aren’t home to give them training, monitoring and direction!

It’s time to make some sacrifices and it must be in our fancy lifestyles and not our children’s lives! Women, we must ask God to return the love of our homes back to our hearts and get out of the”‘money-making” mode. Fathers who are being spoiled by their wives money making abilities, we must ask God to shape their hearts and minds to peacefully and economically find a way for their wives to be home minding to the children as they work for the primary provision of the family.

It can be done even in this day and time of great economic oppression.

Anyone DON’T think so?

Teaching Children Sexual Purity

As a single mother, I spent a few years on welfare following the separation and divorce from my husband and father of all five of my children. This article isn’t for the intent of support for welfare as it has its myriads of problems, but for the sake of fixing a problem, I want to use my family as an example.

The point of me sharing the story about my welfare experience, because welfare is blamed for much of the deterioration of the black family. Some would say, “If we could just get rid of welfare, then the black family would be in shape.” I agree though that welfare has made it easier for many to be sexually irresponsible, but it is not the primary factor for sexual promiscuity. My premise is that where there is no spiritual grounding, then there will be more problems within a family, such as sexual promiscuity and illegitimate births.

I’ve raised five children while on welfare. My children have no children, and my daughters are beautiful and still virgins. I’ve raised my children first by sharing with them that as a Christian family, we honor the scriptures and what is says about sex: not before marriage!

As a Christian parent, there is much pressure to include within sex education, the passing out of condoms and birth control pills. With my past in my mind (birth control pills allowed and sexually active at 15) I raised my children quite the opposite. They were taught what condoms and pills were for but to use them within marriage. They were also taught to save themselves for marriage as the scriptures teach. And it was not necessary to have condoms and pills as emergency backups in case my children felt the need to have sex. My teachings were consistent – no sex means no sex! Therefore, protection wasn’t even in the equation.

That was years ago and my children are all adults now, 18 years through 29 and I’m reflecting upon what is was that I’ve done to help them become sexually responsible. That was achieved by teaching them abstinence as taught in the Bible. These are some of the things I want to share, especially for the single-parent who is all alone and struggling in all areas of life.

1. As a parent and leader of your children, you yourself must have a strong spiritual foundation and that foundation must be in Jesus Christ:
   

   For no other foundation can anyone lay than that which is laid, which is Jesus Christ. 1 Corinthians 3:11

   As a parent, we must first be an example to our children. It starts with us being born-again and then being guided strongly by the word of God, the Bible. If our children see that we aren’t following God, then why should they? Children are going to do what we do and not as we say!

2. Lead your children to Christ! The children need Christ in their lives to have the power and conviction to live a life after God.
   

   “. . . ‘You must be born again.’” John 3:7

   Every parent’s primary goal should be that of leading their child to Christ. It is our responsibility to share the gospel, but if the child should reject God, at least a parent can stand before God and say, “I tried.”

3. Find a strong bible teaching church that has a very vibrant youth department where your children will be comfortable in.
   

   “not forsaking the assembling of ourselves together, . . .” Hebrews 10:25

   With the myriad of great churches here in San Diego to choose from, I asked around and the church I attend now is the one church that I heard people talk about the most for the youth. Sure enough, my children enjoy it immensely and love their youth pastors. These pastors have come to our aid when the children needed strong counseling. (And incidentally, I enjoy this church too!)

4. Make a “NO SEX” rule like you make other rules in the home. Whether your kids believe in Christ or not, you make this the rule in your home.
   

   “Train a child in the way he should go, and when he is old he will not turn from it.” Proverbs 22:6

   I told my children that sex is for marriage, and if any of them break that rule and I find out about it, then they will suffer consequences. I told them I better not see any condoms or pills as those are things they want to save for their marriage if they need to use them.

5. Teach them “what says the Lord!” They must know that it’s God’s rule first above yours. And that a sign of their love for God is by their obedience.
   

   “If you love Me, keep My commandments.” John 14:15

6. Seek “Purity” conferences – I don’t remember the name of the one I sent my children to here in San Diego, but it was a one day, all day event. The parents drop the kids off and they along with other children hear Christian leaders and they get to join in pretty fun events. This one day event I took my children to seemed to have the greatest impact on them regarding sex.
   

   ” For this is the will of God, your sanctification: that you should abstain from sexual immorality;” 1 Thessalonians 4:3

   It’s one thing for old fuddy duddy mom trying to teach them, but its another to have youthful folks tell them the same thing! My kids fought me tooth and nail and really had no interest in going. But I made it mandatory and when they saw the kids that looked like them at this conference…and when my son saw other boys with braids, almost saggy pants and mohawk haircuts, then he knew he may have a little fun.

7. And if your child should have sex, do share with them God’s forgiveness of their sin as well as your forgiveness of them.
   

   “If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness.” 1 John 1:9

   Do let them know that they still have to experience the consequences of their disobedience to you since that is a house rule. Their consequence of breaking God’s rule, He’ll handle His way with your child. But show them love and acceptance as God shows us love and acceptance when we have sinned and ask forgiveness of Him. (I’d settle any day for a parents consequence than God’s!)

It’s very important if families don’t want their children or themselves to become one of the CDC’s STD statistics, they must have a well grounded spiritual life. It doesn’t matter if one is poor and on welfare or if one is rich. If you don’t believe in Christ, follow His principles for living as found in the bible, then sexual problems and disease will more than likely follow. It’s a given that if your are more sexually active, then that increases your chance of STDs. That rate falls dramatically when sex is not practiced at all!

I’m a conservative now and was conservative while on welfare. And yes, I was burnt then by the welfare haters and the disrespect continues even today while I share my stories. Hopefully, people see through their welfare prejudice and understand the totality of what I’m trying to say regarding the state of the family, especially the black family.

I’m a witness. No matter the financial status, following Christ works! Many will say that it’s just plain unrealistic to teach abstinence. It is the parents responsibility to teach, and the child’s responsibility to obey. The obedience helps is we just do our job and TEACH IT!

Listed below is a few things to help, books to buy, websites with free advice. I’d like to know of favorites for you readers. Please share your favorites!

Here are a few of mine:

Resources for families

Family books written by Pastor Miles (The Rock Church San Diego)

Recommended books by my church, the Rock Church San Diego

HomeWord: Where Parents Get Real Answers (website for answers)

Focus on the Families

Top 3 STDs and their statistics

Something has been gnawing on my soul ever since I heard it reported on the news: the STD rates among women are increasing each year, especially the teenagers and young adult women. STDs are taking a toll not only physically, but economically too. And statistically, the greater number of STDs are from black women.

Being black and a mother, this is especially alarming. What is going on within the black family and why are we more prone to STDs then others? I may have a few answers with definite solutions to those issues.

But first a few facts from the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (the CDC).

Sexually transmitted diseases (STDs) remain a major public health challenge in the United States. While substantial progress has been made in preventing, diagnosing, and treating certain STDs in recent years, CDC estimates that approximately 19 million new infections occur each year, almost half of them among young people ages 15 to 24. In addition to the physical and psychological consequences of STDs, these diseases also exact a tremendous economic toll. Direct medical costs associated with STDs in the United States are estimated at up to $14.7 billion annually in 2006 dollars.

19 million new infections each year and that mostly from the young 15 -24? Ouch! What mother wouldn’t be concerned about this especially if they have opened the door by allowing their children to be sexually active “as long as they use protection.” Could your or my child be in this category?

The statistics I’ll share are primarily from the three main STD’s that the CDC has concentrated their reporting on: chlamydia, gonorrhea, and syphilis. The CDC laments that most STDs go undetected such as papillomavirus and genital herpes, and aren’t reported at all. But check this out from the CDC starting with the number one reported STD, Chlamydia:

Chlamydia remains the most commonly reported infectious disease in the United States. In 2006, 1,030,911 chlamydia diagnoses were reported, up from 976,445 in 2005. Even so, most chlamydia cases go undiagnosed. It is estimated that there are approximately 2.8 million new cases of chlamydia in the United States each year.

What is chlamydia? According to the CDC:

Chlamydia is a bacterial infection that can easily be cured with antibiotics, but usually occurs without symptoms and often goes undiagnosed. Untreated, it can cause severe health consequences for women, including pelvic inflammatory disease (PID), ectopic pregnancy, and infertility.

I’ve had an ectopic pregnancy and that is one painful thing to have! The baby is lodged in the fallopian tube instead of the womb and it grows there, thus causing the pain! Most ectopic pregnancies are terminated due to its dangerous nature. I had gone to the doctor’s office when I was experiencing the pain, and once it was diagnosed of the ectopic lodging, he told me to go straight to the emergency room he met me and removed not only the baby, but my tube as well. My husband and I had already had two children by that time, but don’t worry you women who have experienced this. I had three more children after the surgery! So yes, the Lord can still bless you with children with just one tube!

Now the next STD, gonorrhea:

Gonorrhea is the second most commonly reported infectious disease in the United States, with 358,366 cases reported in 2006. Following a 74 percent decline in the rate of reported gonorrhea from 1975 through 1997, overall gonorrhea rates plateaued, then increased for the past two years. In 2006, the gonorrhea rate was 120.9 cases per 100,000 population, an increase of 5.5 percent since 2005 and an increase for the second consecutive year. Like chlamydia, gonorrhea is substantially under-diagnosed and under-reported, and approximately twice as many new infections are estimated to occur each year as are reported.

And some info on gonorrhea:

While gonorrhea is easily cured, untreated cases can lead to serious health problems. Among women, gonorrhea is a major cause of PID, which can lead to chronic pelvic pain, ectopic pregnancy, and infertility. In men, untreated gonorrhea can cause epididymitis, a painful infection in the tissue surrounding the testicles that can result in infertility. In addition, studies suggest that presence of gonorrhea infection makes an individual three to five times more likely to acquire HIV, if exposed.

Scary news here about gonorrhea, it is increasingly becoming more resistant to drugs, especially among the men have sex with men (MSM) category:

Overall, 13.8 percent of gonorrhea isolates tested through GISP in 2006 demonstrated resistance to fluoroquinolones, a leading class of antibiotics previously recommended to treat the disease, compared to 9.4 percent in 2005 and 6.8 percent in 2004. Resistance to the fluoroquinolones has been highest among men who have sex with men (MSM). From 2005 to 2006, resistance among heterosexuals nearly doubled from 3.8 to 7 percent and continued to increase among MSM from 29 to 39 percent.

And the third most common STD, syphilis which according to the CDC, numbers has increased for the sixth straight year:

The rate of primary and secondary (P&S) syphilis — the most infectious stages of the disease — decreased throughout the 1990s, and in 2000 reached an all-time low. However, over the past six years, the syphilis rate in the United States has been increasing. Between 2005 and 2006, the national P&S syphilis rate increased 13.8 percent, from 2.9 to 3.3 cases per 100,000 population, and the number of cases increased from 8,724 to 9,756.

Syphilis info:

Syphilis, a genital ulcerative disease, is highly infectious, but easily curable in its early (primary and secondary) stages. If untreated, it can lead to serious longterm complications, including brain, cardiovascular, and organ damage, and even death. Congenital syphilis can cause stillbirth, death soon after birth, and physical deformity and neurological complications in children who survive. Syphilis, like many other STDs, facilitates the spread of HIV by increasing the likelihood of transmission of the virus.

Again, the men having sex with men category is a leading cause of the rising statistics for syphilis:

Rising Rates Driven Largely by Cases among Men Who Have Sex with Men

The rate of P&S syphilis among men has risen 54 percent over the past five years (from 3.7 per 100,000 in 2002 to 5.7 per 100,000 in 2006), driving overall increases in syphilis rates for the nation.

This isn’t even talking about AIDS but here are some facts regarding that STD and the black man or woman:

When we look at HIV/AIDS by race and ethnicity, we see that African Americans have

• More illness. Even though blacks (including African Americans) account for about 13% of the US population, they account for about half (49%) of the people who get HIV and AIDS.
• Shorter survival times. Blacks with AIDS often don’t live as long as people of other races and ethnic groups with AIDS. This is due to the barriers mentioned above.
• More deaths. For African Americans and other blacks, HIV/AIDS is a leading cause of death.

These are all very alarming statistics and something has to be done to stop these increases, if not eradicating these diseases altogether. That in itself may not be possible, but at least getting these statistics to decrease and not increase! How can we begin to do that? Where does it all start? What can we do to slow down these statistics?

My theory to that answer in Part 2.

The article on WorldNetDaily.com starts:

A new Colorado law is helping homosexual activists achieve their goal of forcing Christians to teach biblical condemnation of homosexuality only behind the closed doors of their sanctuaries.

This isn’t Canada or some far off place not connected to North America, but right here in the US of A! According to this article, this law’s intent was to keep everything churches teach within the sanctuary only, but written material or anything else that proves hurtful to the homosexual person, would be illegal. Here’s the bill from WND’s site:

Section 8. 24-34-701. Publishing of discriminative matter forbidden. No person, being the owner, lessee, proprietor, manager, superintendent, agent, or employee of any place of public accommodation… shall publish, issue, circulate, send, distribute, give away, or display in any way, manner, or shape or by any means or method, except as provided in this section, any communication, paper, poster, folder, manuscript, book, pamphlet, writing, print, letter, notice, or advertisement of any kind, nature, or description THAT is intended or calculated to discriminate or actually discriminates against… SEXUAL ORIENTATION, marital status… in the matter of furnishing or neglecting or refusing to furnish to them or any one of them any lodging, housing, schooling, or tuition or any accommodation, right [marriage], privilege [adoption], advantage, or convenience… on account of… SEXUAL ORIENTATION, marital status… [which] is unwelcome or objectionable or not acceptable, desired, or solicited.”

Read the article in its entirety at WorldNetDaily.com!

On my pastor’s blog, (MilesMcPherson, The Rock Church San Diego), I responded to posts written by a gay man named Tom. (For the full discussion click here: “Why Support Biblical Marriage, Part 1″) Pastor Miles has a two part post on why this whole gay/heterosexual marriage debate is extremely important and I urge anyone who hasn’t read it to do so. (Link available on my blog list – click “older post” for complete messages).

Tom did shatter my perceptions of “intense debates with Gay/Lesbian people” because with my past experiences, they all ended up with the person usually cursing at me. But Tom was different. Cool, calm and collected as well as intelligent. He presented a formidable challenge, but nevertheless, work had to be done.

To sum up all of Tom’s posting, the following things were claimed:

1. Because of his never-ending struggle with homosexuality, he came to the conclusion that since God didn’t take away his desires, then it was God’s will that he is gay and to accept it as such.
   

   I had to learn that no matter how much I gave my life to God, and no matter how ridiculously good I strived to be in all aspects of my life, that He was unwilling to change my struggle, just as God doesn’t take away Down’s Syndrome. Instead, God shapes each of us uniquely, and it is our duty to honor Him by acknowledging those struggles and acting responsibly towards them. We can’t (and shouldn’t) change who we “are,” but we can (and must) decide how we “act.”

2. Because of the sad state of heterosexual marriages and single-parent families, then homosexual marriages should be considered for the stability of the family.
   

   With such high divorce rates and single parents raising kids, it could be argued that a stable, two-parent same-sex household with a stay-at-home parent is a lesser evil than a single working parent. At least someone is home with the children.

   The problem is that, with heterosexual marriage being such a tattered institution, we as a society need to decide whether or not we want to not only define it as a union between a man and a woman, but also one specifically designed to promote a well-nurtured family. If we all agree that a stable household with a mom and dad is optimal for child rearing, then we would have to go much further in legislation than just limiting the genders of married couples

   . . . .– given that people will continue to be gay, some sort of legislation that encourages gays and lesbians to enter into monogamous lifelong relationships is surely better for society as a whole than to push people into the “closet”

3. Being gay is not a sin.
   

   I believe, however, that the notion that being gay may be okay in the eyes of God goes beyond the argument that it is merely innate. I believe it has very much to do with the more fundamental question of whether being gay is in fact a sin, as stealing, adultery, or pedophilia are, or whether the positive experience of monogamous love between any two committed adults is necessarily a blessing from God.

   Adultery, pedophilia, theft, murder, destruction, and lying, all physically or emotionally harm another person. Sexuality, when honored in the context of monogamous love, does not do this.

4. The Bible can’t be trusted.
   

   . . . even though some churches will theologically believe that it is scripturally irrefutable that homosexuality is by its very nature sinful, a number of centuries-old Christian faiths are still debating this issue. Regardless of what side of the debate one is on, the mere existence of such a debate shows how, even though the Bible reflects the word of God, once it is in the hands of mankind’s subjectivity, interpretation, linguistic translations, and revisions, it becomes intrinsically influenced and affected by man’s nature.

   And so I believe that despite primarily scriptural arguments that same-sex attraction is sinful, all the goodness that I am blessed to experience in my same-sex relationship, coupled with God’s inspiration to treat that relationship with the same respect I would give a heterosexual relationship, in its totality cannot convince me that homosexuality is by its nature sinful.

   We should never presume that the Bible, with is many edits, revisions, versions, and translations over the centuries, has not been in any way affected by our imperfect humanity.

5. Homosexuality is just as innate as having an incurable disease (also seen in #1).
   

   If I were born with cerebral palsy, I would have to accept that I could do lesser things than a fully-functioning person, but I would never presume that I were not made in God’s image, that I should pray for God to heal my condition, or that my life had less value than another. Similarly, I have had to learn to accept that God will not change my nature, that I will face limitations on the nature of any romantic relationship I enter into, and I may well face harsh judgment from those who don’t understand the experience of being gay.

In my conversations with gays, including one very intense discussion with one of my favorite female cousins, the one thing that the church-going gays all have in common is a profession of faith in God but little belief that the bible was the infallible word of God. The only way it seems that they could perhaps feel comfortable with their lifestyle is to somehow deem God’s word “questionable” so that their their sexual relationships are not considered sin.

As of this writing, the only thing that seems to have quieted Tom was the questions about his church experience. By claiming to be Christian, then the next questions posed to him was about church. Another gay person (did not identify if male or female) did post on this discussion and mentioned that they were members of a church. A fellow Rock Church poster (Bradley) looked up the doctrinal position of this church and discovered that this person belonged to a church that teaches the infallibility of the word of God.

If one is gay, professes to know Christ and goes to church, then naturally we want to know what kind of church they attend. Tom was so sure of himself with no apparent conviction about his lifestyle, I couldn’t help but to think that someone, or some group was making him feel quite comfortable. I came to these conclusions about Tom and others like him:

1. He goes to a church with a with a gay perspective (Gay churches such as the Metropolitan Community Church system).
2. He goes to a church that teaches the inerrancy of the bible but the church allows homosexuality.
3. He goes to a church that teaches the inerrancy of the bible and homosexuality as a sin, but no one knows of his homosexual lifestyle, thus no discipline.
4. He doesn’t go to church but leaves his spirituality to himself and those close to him only.

Well, there were a few of us Christians that posted to Tom and my prayer is that some seeds were planted. It was an interesting debate, but a discussion that helped me to really dig and prepare more for future discussions with those who practice homosexuality.

We as a church should be ashamed. The issue of homosexuality is grown to where it is and could we be to blame? The church as a whole I see is getting away from the word of God with many pastors buckling under Political Correctness and admitting homosexuality within their churches (thank God, Pastor Miles is not one of those). And many churches that do teach the word are very lax in practicing church discipline. In the mega-churches (such as the Rock) it is impossible for the pastor to know who is doing what, so much of the discipline is delegated to the small groups, the heart and soul of the large churches. It is within these small groups that people can get to know one another for the encouragement, emotional and spiritual support combined with discipline that’s needed. The smaller churches it becomes easier to get to know people thus making it more possible to establish discipline.

What can we do as soldiers for Christ? The sin of homosexuality is one of the few sins that is organized and being flaunted as a non-sin. We don’t see adulterers, polygamists (maybe soon though), bigamists, pedophiles (with the exception of some of these boy/man groups) and any other sin you can think of, forming to announce their legitimacy.

If our writers of the Independence could have forseen the potential for the traditional marriage being undermined by the rise of homosexuality, perhaps there would have been laws created to protect marriage at that time. But it wasn’t even a thought and thus the problems that we are experiencing today. Not only is homosexuality affecting the state of marriages, but has infiltrated our schools, and in some cases, one’s freedom of speech is threatened if their stance against homosexuality is considered “hate speech.”

Here in California, we must take a stand and in November and vote for the Gay marriage ban. As Christians we must hold that the bible is true and pray for a spirit of meekness to share the word to not only those who practice homosexuality, but any thing that is considered a transgression of God’s law!

We are all ministers of the gospel of Christ and must heed the words of the apostle Paul as he spoke to Timothy:

“Preach the word! Be ready in season and out of season. Convince, rebuke, exhort, with all longsuffering and teaching. For the time will come when they will not endure sound doctrine, but according to their own desires, because they have itching ears, they will heap up for themselves teachers; and they will turn their ears away from the truth, and be turned aside to fables. But you be watchful in all things, endure afflictions, do the work of an evangelist, fulfill your ministry.”
— 2 Timothy 4:2-5

Because I’m dealing with topics that cover a spectrum of things pertaining to Christianity, I’ve renamed my blog back to a name I had given it back in January of 2007 – Christocentric! I created that name originally from my christocentric.com website as it’s explained below. My ministry is primarily to refute Afrocentricism, which is a practice I feel extremely detrimental to blacks and is more divisive then helpful. We witness this with a church such as Trinity United Church of Christ which tries its best in attempting to be relevant to blacks by adopting afrocentric teachings such as Black Liberation Theology.

Dangerous, dangerous, dangerous!

But in addition to debunking afrocentricism, my blog will be open to ANYTHING in defense of the Christian faith. An example of that is the discussion on homosexuality.

Anyways, here’s a rehash of my previous post on the meaning of the name Christocentric.

Now, flashback:

_______________________________________________________________

I’ve finally settled on a name for my blog – Christocentric. Kind of easy because it’s the same as my website. But what in the heck does it mean?

Let’s see, straight from the Webster’s dictionary:

Christocentric
\Chris”to*cen”tric\, a. [Christ + centric.] Making Christ the center, about whom all things are grouped, as in religion or history; tending toward Christ, as the central object of thought or emotion. –J. W. Chadwick.

Why did I go against all the rules of choosing a domain and blog name by making it long and difficult to pronounce? I chose it to counter the name of “afrocentric,” a way of thinking that in my opinion is detrimental to a black individual’s relationship to God AND to society.

That opinion in itself will get me into a lot of trouble with mainstream “African-Americans.” I won’t use the term African-American in my primary writings because to me, that is an afrocentric term. I prefer to just use the term “black” to describe Americans of African ancestry. Most of us conservative blacks prefer that name anyway and conservative I am.

But what does afrocentric or afrocentricity mean?

Here’s the definition by noted black afrocentric scholars and Institutions:

Wade W. Nobles
“Afrocentric, Africentric, or Afirican Centered” are interchangeable terms representing the concept which categorizes a quality of thought and practice which is rooted in the cultural image and interest of African people and which represents and reflects the life experiences, history and traditions of African people as the center of analyses. It is therein, the intellectual and philosophical foundation which African people should create their own scientific criterion for authenticating human reality.”

Molefi Asante (1987)
“Afrocentricity [African centered] as the placing of African ideals at the center of any analysis that involves African culture and behavior.”

Maulana Karenga (1994)
Afrocentricity can be defined as a quality of thought and practice rooted in the cultural image and human interest of African people [and their descendants]. To be rooted in the cultural image of African people is to be anchored in the views and values of African people as well as in the practice which emanates from and gives rise to these views and values.

Kean College Africana Studies
The African centered perspective rests on the premise that it is valid to position Africa as a geographical and cultural starting base in the study of peoples of African descent (Keto 1989). The objective therefore is to view the world from the perspective of the people studied. The Afro-centric comprehensive model for the teaching and learning of knowledge about African peoples makes possible an understanding of, and appreciation for the social, institutional, cultural and intellectual patterns of African people.

These are just a few that I dug up from this website: http://www.afrocentric.info/AfricanCentered/Definitions.html..

On this same page is the following which is the thrust of the afrocentric thought. It is titled, “Some things to consider.”

1. “African Centered” is a thought (philosophy) not continent or appearance.
2. African Centered is a “how process.”
3. Cultural heritage provides the lenses by which we view and the foundation on which we interpret the world.

The last one, #3 is the clincher: cultural heritage encompasses an afrocentric’s world view. That one “thing to consider” is a reason why many blacks take celebrations like Kwanzaa so seriously. Their heritage is providing a way to view their world!

So with these definitions and explanations, I begin to truly give more direction to my blog here. I’m dedicating this blogosphere to refuting afrocentricity as a way of life for the black man, woman or child and introducing the BEST way – the way of Jesus Christ – “christocentrically” speaking!