Christocentric

“‘I’m not going to depend on NO MAN to take care of me!” That was the cry of one of the women at a bible study I attended several years ago at a women’s single’s ministry.  Each woman was asked what she thought about a man being the breadwinner and only 2 out of the 24 women (I was one of the two) agreed that a man should be the provider of his family.

The 2 out of 24 women shared in the paragraph above was close to a startling statistic shared by Pastor John MacArthur.  On his website titled God’s Pattern for Children Part 1 (pdf file), he shows that only 7% of families consist of a husband as the breadwinner and a wife as a homemaker. And that article was written in 1997! No wonder there’s so much pressure for our young adults to conform to society when most have strayed from what is considered a “normal” family!

But with many families succeeding in a non-traditional family model, why bother with traditional roles?  That answer to me is very easy.  The family has been attacked and we are seeing far too many consequences of women taking on the role of money-makers, bread-winners to the destruction of their own families and men not assuming their responsibilities of their families.  Men whose leadership is often usurped by women who don’t believe in submitting to their husband’s leadership or men who abuse their leadership position by oppressing their wives emotionally, physically and spiritually.

Consequences of “No One Home” with Children after School

With women believing they’re no different then men and taking to the workforce, another disturbing statistic becomes evident: no one is left at home to keep children out of trouble!  Statistics confirm this in a 2006 report by California law enforcement titled Nearly One Million Teens Left Unsupervised After School, Threatening Public Safety. That stat was shared because of the growing crime problems that police encountered when children got out of school between the hours of 2-6pm daily. Problems such as drug use, thefts, fights, and more kept police busy during those after school hours.  That’s not including the number of teens participating in illicit sex resulting in abortions for unplanned pregnancies or out-of -wedlock births.  With more and more mothers working along with fathers, children are often left to fend for themselves.

It’s costing us dearly not having strong families and we must return to what strengthens and not weaken it!  But how do we do that with so much pressure to do otherwise? Doesn’t today’s poor economy justify women working now?

Teaching our Daughters to be future Keepers of their Homes

As a mother myself, my heart aches for the young women and mothers.  I’ve seen the effects of women leaving their natural desire to nurture their children to chase after riches, fame or “respect.”  Many women aren’t content with the little appreciated role of homemaker, so they have left the responsibility of raising their children to others while they seek fulfillment in jobs away from home.

We send our children to schools to become educated in how to earn a living, but not how to be men, women, future wives or husbands and mothers and fathers.  So not only are our children not learning from us, but they are learning from the world unbiblical ways of living.

Carolyn Mahaney, author of Girl Talk: Mother-Daughter Conversations on Biblical Womanhood and Feminine Appeal: Seven Virtues of a Godly Wife and Mother wrote the following:

“God did not assign this vital training to educational institutions. Instead, Scripture says that the older women should teach the young women to be effective home managers and to love their husbands and children (Titus 2:3-5). As with all other aspects of biblical womanhood, it is the mother’s job to teach and the daughter’s job to learn.”

The Scriptures and Homemaking

“ 3 Older women likewise are to be reverent in behavior, not slanderers or slaves to much wine. They are to teach what is good, 4 and so train the young women to love their husbands and children, 5 to be self-controlled, pure, working at home, kind, and submissive to their own husbands, that the word of God may not be reviled. Titus 2:3-5 (ESV)

Carolyn Mahaney describes homemaking:

“But the truth is that homemaking involves so much more than just cleaning a house. The commands in Scripture to love, follow, and help a husband; to raise children for the glory of God; and to manage a home encompass a vast responsibility. Homemaking requires an extremely diverse array of skills—everything from management abilities, to knowledge of health and nutrition, to interior decorating capabilities, to childhood development expertise. If you are to become an effective homemaker, then you must study these subjects and many more.”

Are we teaching our daughters God’s model of true womanhood? Or are we insisting that our daughters be taught that no man needs to take care of them, if they marry make sure they have their own secret checking accounts and never never have a man tell them what to do? It’s a wonder so many men are emasculated by overbearing women!

So much gender confusion exists because we don’t know our roles as women and men.  Men are feminized and women are made masculine as they either are confused are rebel against God’s standard on true manhood and womanhood.

I have sons and daughters and they are raised differently.  Sons to be providers and leaders of their homes while serving their wives and children, and my daughters to be submissive to their husbands and homemakers if they have  children. The girls are both nearly finished with college and although they may be working when they get married, they are taught to use their husband’s income for their source of living only! Possible? If single parents are expected to make it alone, surely a household with a parent providing “free” childcare can!

Watch out for the Feminist Men Haters!

The biggest challenge for the Christian is the world’s standard of families.  That’s feminists who bristle at the word “submission” and those who believe that men aren’t even needed to raise families (lesbians, gays, etc.).  Just as I shared in the first paragraph, feminism has a stronghold in the church and must be weeded out! We older women need to teach the younger women what it means to be a godly woman and it starts with US! Learn godliness, teach our children and then to all others!

So much to learn and there’s so much more to this topic that I can’t squeeze all into one post, but I’ll list a few resources to get started with for anyone interested in learning what it means to be a true man or woman in Christ!

A Call to Biblical Womanhood – By Nancy Leigh DeMoss

Homemaking Internship - by Carol Mahaney

Recovering Biblical Manhood and Womanhood
A Response to Evangelical Feminism – by Wayne Grudem and John Piper

True Woman - website/conference dedicated to women discovering and experiencing God’s design and calling for their lives (HIGHLY RECOMMENDED FOR ALL WOMEN!) Past speakers have included John Piper, Janet Parshall, Joni Eareckson Tada, Fern Nichols and many more.

The Council on Biblical Manhood and Womanhood – entire website dedicated to teaching true biblical gender roles.  Board members include Albert Mohler, John Piper, Joshua Harris (pastor and author of “I Kissed Dating Goodbye) and more!

Grace to You – John MacArthur (see Resources, Study Guides)

Women’s Interests – book suggestions from the Rock Church bookstore

Men’s Interests – book suggestions from the Rock Church bookstore

Charlene Cothran was a lesbian activist for over 30 years before accepting Christ as her Lord and Savior.  She was the publisher of a 35,000 plus circulation magazine called Venus that targeted black gays and lesbians .  After her conversion that magazine transformed into a Christian periodical that targets the same group of people.  See her cover story from this magazine titled:  Redeemed! 10 Ways to Get Out of the Gay Life, If You Want Out

Charlene lost many of her advertisers when her magazine converted to Christian based content so do stop by and offer her some much deserved support either morally, financially or both!  Go to Evidence Ministries at http://www.venusmagazine.org/.

This first video is a condensed version of the two-part videos that follow it regarding her lifestyle and transformation into the vibrant witness of Jesus Christ that she is today. It is powerful as it describes her point of conviction and the years it took until she eventually quit fighting God and submitted completely to His will.

For the full transcript of this video go the Christian Broadcast Network’s (CBN) website. Click here.

More on Charlene Cothran (long version):

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